But I am!
A few weeks ago we got an E-mail from Travis and Lindsey announcing Baby #4!
An e-mail? really?
After the actual announcement, was a long, long, long, explanation. I guess they figured they had to answer to us. LOL
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| (These tests were taken at our house by the way) I remember after they were loaded up to head home that day, Jeff made a comment about how crammed in the van they were. All of them, their Christmas and the dog. I also remember saying, "that's one more reason to have no babies for a long, long time. I mean it!" They looked at each other kind of funny, which of course I thought meant, butt, out and quit telling us your opinion, knowing I worried enough about them already. Little did I know it meant, if only she knew! |
A new Grandbaby is always good news to me! I love babies! I always have. I was the little girl walking around at church begging to hold people's babies. I was the girl everyone trusted to start tending kids much younger than other girls. I was the teenager who dreamed of nothing more than being a mom. I was the mom who tried to cherish every moment of pregnancy, giving birth, nursing and then watching and loving each stage. It didn't take me long to start longing for more after each and every one. Then comes the time when you know that phase in your life is over and go through the grieving process a little at a time knowing you will never carry, give birth or nurse a baby again. That was really hard for me, but I made it through, mostly because I had no choice!
I couldn't wait to be a Grandma! When we got the phone call from Shawn and Amber I was thrilled and excited beyond belief! Finally once again I would be able to feel that pure love for a new baby!
I ran around the house and the shouted it out the door (really I did). My new song of joy.
"I'm going to be a Grandma! I'm going to be a Grandma!"
Each pregnancy announcement has filled my heart with the same joy.
What a wonderful, ride it has been. I have so loved watching babies being born. I am so blessed to have daughters who allowed me this sacred experience. I am so grateful Michon too, invited me to come in with her. Even though I couldn't in the end, just knowing she would ask meant so much to me. Loving all our Grandchildren and watching them grow, playing with them, and getting to know them, has been nothing I can describe. I love them all each and every one!
We have two special Grandchildren in heaven. Clint and Jamie lost a baby and when Michon died we lost another sweet baby. I also lost a baby of my own, so I feel the pain that comes with loss.
Someday we will meet the special little spirits who never made it here to earth. That will be a wonderful reunion for all of us. As for now, I am confident Michon and my Mom and many others that we love, are caring for Grandbabies lost and Grandbabies yet to come!
So, even though I have worries for Lindsey and Travis and their little family, such as children close together, sweet Kenna with special needs, Grahm taking on a lot of responsibility and Reese still a baby herself , also the worry of them being so far away, too far for me to help, Lindsey struggling to juggle her life mentally and physically, Travis working hard in school and trying to carry the financial burden and protecting rolls for his family.
I still feel the joy of another baby on the way!
We will help as much as we can and love whoever this little spirit is that is coming to our family and trust in Heavenly Fathers plan.
Every Little Thing ... Will Be Alright!
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